It took a while, I was an inpatient for 4/5 days as I looked down the barrel of the gun that said that surgery was going to be the best option for me at this point.
I fought it so hard. I looked into alternative medication therapies, asked question after question as to why I couldnt try this, that and the other, but it was becoming glaringly obvious that the drugs just were not working.
The last time that I was in hospital, IV steroids got the symptoms under control very quickly. This time, they werent quite cutting it and with every day of ‘we can try the steroids for one more day’, it meant that my body simply wasn’t having a good time.
I made the decision that I was going to need to have surgery. There were a lot of tears and tantrums, and “it’s not fair”.
The surgery involves removing the colon, and will therefore leave me with a ileostomy and a stoma. It’s a massive adjustment and it has implications that run far and wide into my life.
I work a job that needs me to be physically fit, I play rugby and that is a huge part of who I am. On top of this, I had to think about how I would cope living with a stoma, how I would feel as a woman and what this would do to me emotionally.
I thought this through a lot and had A LOT of conversations with my nearest and dearest. As ever Jordan, my Mum and my Dad have been my sounding board, listening to me talk, in circles often, trying to make sense of everything that is about to happen.
I decided that surgery was going to be the best option. The next drug treatment would take 6 months to work and actually only had a 20% change of working. So I would have to risk being on steroids and whatever else for 6 months, as well as being in pain and coping with the effects of the disease. I look at this as the best chance of possibly being able to get a good quality of life.
And so the research commenced, what does this really mean to me? How will my life change and am I ok with that? I came to the conclusion that with the write attitude and the right support, I could manage this.
I saw surgeons and stoma nurses, went on google and instagram, talked to my friends and family.
And so the decision was made. I am having surgery on 2nd February 2021 (hopefully) and I start my recovery from there. Any well wishes much appreciated!